This is a little sneak peak into Panty Vigilantes, the book I am writing for men who wear lingerie and other women’s clothing. This particular section is aimed at women dealing with the news that the man they love also loves panties. Your feedback is, as always, welcome.
This section is dedicated to women who have found themselves unexpectedly in a relationship with a man who wears women’s clothing. That is to say, you knew you were in a relationship, you weren’t so well aware that the fellow you love is also the fellow who has been sneaking your panties. (Make him stop that, by the way and get him some of his own. Unless you like it, in which case, hey, go to town!)
Discovering that one’s partner wears women’s clothing can be a shock, especially if it isn’t something you’ve really thought about before. I know that many years ago, when my boyfriend of the time informed me that he liked to wear panties, it was something entirely new to me.
At this point, if you haven’t already, I’d advise you to read the other sections of the booklet as well as this one, they answer questions like ‘does this mean he is gay’ in detail. To cut a long story short however, the fact that a man has a soft spot for lingerie or other items of women’s clothing does not mean that he is less of a man, that he is less heterosexual, or that he will not make a good partner.
On the contrary, men who wear lingerie make some of the best partners because they appreciate sensitivity and subtlety. They greatly admire feminine traits and therefore, they often love their female partners more deeply than other men. This is not to say that a man who doesn’t wear lingerie can’t be madly in love with you, he certainly can, but a man who has an active interest in and admiration for femininity will appreciate you in ways you may not have been appreciated before.
The man who wears lingerie and women’s clothing will love going shopping with you. He will love discussing how you look in various garments and he will be more than happy to join in trying them on. He will compliment you when you wear something new. He will notice when you change your hair. Many women have become accustomed to being all but ignored by men who have little appreciation for anything by the most obvious of feminine displays, but women fortunate enough to be loved by men who wear women’s clothing will find that their subtle efforts never go unappreciated.
Getting Comfortable With Lingerie
When you first see your man wearing lingerie or other items of women’s clothing your reaction may or may not be favorable. Oftentimes men have far better taste in lingerie than women simply because, well, having been obsessed with something since you were a little kid is an excellent way to refine your taste.
Your partner may or may not shave himself when he wears lingerie. Personally I think lingerie looks better on a shaved body, whether the wearer is male or female, your preferences and milage may vary.
Give yourself time to become accustomed to seeing him in lingerie. The same goes for any other items of women’s clothing. Though it is just clothing, and it doesn’t matter who wears it, we are still inevitably conditioned by society to see men one way and when they break the mold, there is a period of adjustment. Give yourself that period of adjustment and you may find that you start to quite enjoy him in his lingerie.
No, I Cannot Accept This On Any Level
Still not convinced? Feel you’ll never be able to accept something like this from the man you’re with? Well, that is your decision and you have every right to feel that way and to act on that feeling.
However just because you have a right to hold any opinion you like it doesn’t mean that your feelings aren’t coming from a place of inequality. Do you yourself wear jeans? Do you wear any attire that once would have been considered masculine? Shorts? A T-Shirt? Hosiery? High Heels? All of these garments were once the exclusive domain of the male. Over the years women have made them their own and nowadays we women enjoy a freedom of fashion that our fore mothers could only have dreamed of. Most modern women are by 15th century standards, raving cross dressers. If you think that it is okay because it’s now a social norm, you might want to spend a while thinking long and hard about why you value social norms over the happiness of your partner.
Think too about this. Would you be comfortable with your husband or boyfriend telling you what to wear? Would you be okay with him telling you that you looked unattractive and unfeminine when you wore pants? How would that make you feel about yourself? How would that make you feel about your relationship?
If you truly love a person you won’t care whether they wear panties, a pink tutu or designer pants.
